worktodo | 008 | Saffron City

008 | Saffron City | Video;

[Ladies and gentlemen of Johto and Kanto, something rather odd is afoot on your network today. Upon closer inspection, it appears to be the ceiling of some kind of garage-like room, rendered in video and slo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-owly moving past at a glacial — yet determined — pace. In fact, it's probably what the ceiling would look like if a Gear camera was pointed at it while that aforementioned Gear was being stolen by a pair of Shuckles.

Which, as a matter of fact, is exactly what's happening.

Unfortunately for these criminal masterminds, their getaway is moving at approximately the speed of molasses left out on a park bench in Siberia, so more likely than not they're going to be noticed before anything productive comes of it.]

Well, you look like you check out, pal...

[—and apparently Albert is somewhere in the vicinity, too, given the proximity of his voice as, presumably unbeknownst to him, his Gear goes Shuckling across the floor.]

No obvious growths, no changes in teeth or coat, eyes still look bright, appetite's good...

[The purple head and glittering diamond eyes of a Sableye creep into view on the camera now, disrupting the slow-moving shot of the ceiling, and a minute later things go dark as two little clawed hands close over the lens and Gear.]

Huh. Doesn't look like there's an upper limit to these things after all. Never mind the fact that education of yours just cost as much as grad school, if not — what're you doing, Impy? Don't play with that. Just leave it there, it's fine.

[The darkness recedes, and now the Gear is on its side on a lab table — one currently covered in the pieces of fifteen broken TMs — and Albert is visible next to it. He's wearing his lab coat and gloves as usual, and is holding a Buneary who is rather nonchalantly nibbling at a piece of lettuce.

Albert continues his inspection of the Buneary another few moments, then checks his watch and heads out of sight, still carrying the Pokemon in his arms.]

Sweep and Scrappy can take care of the mess. Let's get you back in the cage, Bruce.

[And on that note, purple hands descend again, and after a few buttons click, the Gear switches off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Tony and McGee get credit too, but Gibbs was the one with the sniper rifle and the holy backlight moment.]

Not all of them. I asked for a list once, but he hasn't ever written them all down apparently. But I have learned most of them over the years anyway.

Okay, so let's hear 'em. How about rule...nine? Has he given you that one?

[He's so curious now, man.]

'Never go anywhere without a knife.'

[One of her favorites!]

[...Girl, he saw you in that dress. Hang on while two and two add up to equal four.]

So are you breaking Rule Nine right now, too, or?

I am, though not because of the dress. It is rather difficult to find a decent blade around here.

I had the same problem with finding a scalpel. I ended up with Dummy, instead.

Perhaps they think it will make things safer.

[...it won't.]

All of the strange Pokemon abilities aside.

It makes it a lot worse in a lot of ways, too. One of my things, a crab, almost ended up murdered, zombified, and possessed because I didn't have the tools to get in and pull a parasite out of him. This place has a pretty skewed idea of what's safe and what's not.

[Ziva nods.]

Never mind how they perform surgeries on people. It cannot be possible that this place has no illnesses that would warrant it.

Even the people here...I may not be the best example of an average person's abilities, but I can certainly cause someone harm if I have reason to. With a knife or no.

[He kind of looks at her sideways a minute, just sort of musing to himself on this and on what he's talked about with Ziva prior to this point, and also what he's learned about the women who tend to hang around the Justice Farm and why underestimating them is never a wise idea, and finally opts to just remark into the chill evening air: ]

So just for the sake of curiosity, how long would it actually take you to break both my legs right now?

[He has a sneaking suspicion it's not very long.]

[seriously you guys are on a date and you're asking her these things.]

Breaking legs is rather difficult. I am hardly that strong.

Incapacitation, though...likely a few seconds.

[aka say goodbye to your knees. At least she's honest about it.]

[LOOK IT'S IMPORTANT TO KNOW, okay. These are valuable things to know about the woman you might find yourself attempting to kiss at the end of the evening. IT INFORMS THE DECISION OF WHETHER OR NOT TO DO IT IN THE FIRST PLACE.]

Okay, well. Just so we all know where we're standing on that.

[Damn, girl.]

How about rule...I don't know, forty?

[Hey, she kissed you on Christmas, remember?]

I was of course conscripted into the Israel Defense Forces at 18 and afterward served in Mossad, therefore not quite average in that regard.

[And she's even selling herself a bit short there, since she was Kidon.]

Forty is 'if it seems that someone is out to get you, they are.'

[That's different, she initiated that. It's totally different.]

I could've told you that you're way above average before we even left the house.

[Also, no wonder she's as rock-solid as she is. And coming from a very, very different career path and lifestyle than Albert's, obviously.]

Your boss sounds like the kind of guy I'd like.

[She laughs at that. SUCH FLATTERY. ♥]

I think you and he would get along very well. The coffee consumption in the house would skyrocket though.

[Seriously. Oh man.]

I believe you would appreciate Rule 23: 'never mess with a Marine's coffee if you wish to live.'

[BETTER THAN SNAPPING HIS LEGS OFF AT THE KNEES, TO BE HONEST.]

Good man.

[He likes the sound of this guy more and more with every passing minute.]

Coop's the one who's really over the moon about his coffee. Yeah, we all live on it, but he enjoys it more than anybody I've ever met.

[She would never do such a thing. To someone she likes, anyway.]

The best.

[With all her daddy issues he is the best and closest thing to a father she has. Well. That she'll actually talk to, anyway.]

I think that anyone that works in the field that we do needs coffee. I drink it as well, when a case gets long. We tend to work through until it is solved.

[Explains the quick turnabout time. Sometimes they'll grab naps on the floor or something.]

[The nice thing about a good conversation is that it makes the time pass fast, and by now they're well into the city proper, making their way through the streets just as all the storefront lights start coming on.]

Tell me about it. Murderers aren't usually considerate enough to bump people off short commutes from my lab. A lot of times I have to spend half the damn day driving across the state just to get to the body first.

[But this is why he also has underlings, so.]

[Ziva glances around at the lights, they're actually rather pretty reflected off the snow.]

I suppose that is a benefit to our office being located near the greatest concentration of Navy and Marine bases on the east coast. Though recently Gibbs and I had to go to Afghanistan for a case.

[That was a long-ass commute.]

Edited 2013-01-13 19:58 (UTC)

[They're pretty enough, but were Albert on his own time, he probably wouldn't consider them long enough to give them more than a passing thought. Watching Ziva watch them, on the other hand, makes him a little more consciously appreciative; taking a moment to live vicariously through her experience, and all that.

He is the BEST at this dating thing.]

Gibbs is the boss, I'm assuming. What the hell were you two doing over there? The Soviets have been withdrawing — did something kick up over there again?

[...Did he mention he's from 1989 and the Cold War hasn't technically ended yet?]

[SO SUAVE.

She's distracted from confirming that Gibbs is, indeed, her boss, by blinking at the Soviet Union and Cold War thing.]

The Soviet Union no longer exists. It was dissolved in 1991, though Russia still holds great power in the region. The Cold War ended at the same time.

[Her mind's going a mile a minute as she realizes oh shit if you think the Cold War isn't over yet, if she explains the Afghanistan War, she'd have to inevitably go over 9/11. He wouldn't accept 'the military is there because of reasons.' Keep it simple and the response limited in detail, then.]

We were investigating the case of a Marine that went missing during a humanitarian effort, trying to find her. Which we did.

[...Okay, well, he was aware that the Soviet Union was in decline, that much was always a given, and it wasn't like he'd never anticipated the possibility that they'd dissolve someday — because of course America would win the Cold War because that's just how life works — and all things considered it's probably not the first time a mention of the future like that has floated past Albert's ears, but to hear someone actually say it outright just now like this...

Well, damn.

A world without the Soviet Union.

Whoever would've thought.]

Just two more years, huh.

[1989, represent.]

Still sounds pretty dangerous, unless a lot has changed between what I remember and wherever you're at. You made it out okay?

[man she was only 7 in 1989. She feels kinda weird now.]

2012. And yes, we did.

[Well, she and Gibbs did, anyway.]

[He whistles faintly.]

I should get you to tell me the winners of the World Series for the next two decades.

[He pauses, then makes a face.]

My next two. Your previous two.

[Time shenanigans are so stupid.]

[Yes, because that worked out so well for Marty McFly. Ziva smiles. She might know baseball but World Series winners? Hah.]

I would not know anyway.

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[action] yep have to use this one again

[action] sure did do that on purpose, yup

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