worktodo | 008 | Saffron City

[Ladies and gentlemen of Johto and Kanto, something rather odd is afoot on your network today. Upon closer inspection, it appears to be the ceiling of some kind of garage-like room, rendered in video and slo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-owly moving past at a glacial — yet determined — pace. In fact, it's probably what the ceiling would look like if a Gear camera was pointed at it while that aforementioned Gear was being stolen by a pair of Shuckles.

Which, as a matter of fact, is exactly what's happening.

Unfortunately for these criminal masterminds, their getaway is moving at approximately the speed of molasses left out on a park bench in Siberia, so more likely than not they're going to be noticed before anything productive comes of it.]

Well, you look like you check out, pal...

[—and apparently Albert is somewhere in the vicinity, too, given the proximity of his voice as, presumably unbeknownst to him, his Gear goes Shuckling across the floor.]

No obvious growths, no changes in teeth or coat, eyes still look bright, appetite's good...

[The purple head and glittering diamond eyes of a Sableye creep into view on the camera now, disrupting the slow-moving shot of the ceiling, and a minute later things go dark as two little clawed hands close over the lens and Gear.]

Huh. Doesn't look like there's an upper limit to these things after all. Never mind the fact that education of yours just cost as much as grad school, if not — what're you doing, Impy? Don't play with that. Just leave it there, it's fine.

[The darkness recedes, and now the Gear is on its side on a lab table — one currently covered in the pieces of fifteen broken TMs — and Albert is visible next to it. He's wearing his lab coat and gloves as usual, and is holding a Buneary who is rather nonchalantly nibbling at a piece of lettuce.

Albert continues his inspection of the Buneary another few moments, then checks his watch and heads out of sight, still carrying the Pokemon in his arms.]

Sweep and Scrappy can take care of the mess. Let's get you back in the cage, Bruce.

[And on that note, purple hands descend again, and after a few buttons click, the Gear switches off.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[[wait what you don't like violence

god he knew there was a reason he didn't like you]]

He's a Pokemon, not a rabbit, and their main purpose is to win battles for their trainers. What else was I to think when I see you stuffing him full of techniques?

It's a fascinating idea and it would be a shame if you didn't let it evolve to its full potential, that's all.

[ABSOLUTE PACIFISM 4-LYFE, BRO.]

We're told their purpose is to win battles for their trainers. On the other hand, some of us like to think for ourselves, and occasionally look outside the box.

[[THIS BLASPHEMY RN]]

Well if you think their purpose is to be shoved in cages and little else, then by all means, have a party. You could make your own highly-powered zoo.

I, however, would rather have my Pokemon earn their keep.

[YOUR FACE IS BLASPHEMY, DISGUISED MASKED MAN.]

For what? You win some pieces of plastic and some bragging rights? If that's what makes you happy.

[[NO

YOUR

FACE]]

I'm not really the traditional sort of trainer; my Pokemon assist me with my research.

[[by constantly blowing themselves up oop]]

I simply don't see the point of letting such potential wither away to nothing. These creatures are weapons waiting to be optimized.

[STRANGER DANGER SENSES TINGLING NOW, KATO.]

Weapons waiting to be optimized? It's a bunny rabbit. Are you out of your mind?

[[AT LEAST HE ISN'T TALKING ABOUT THE ART OF DEATH AND DESTRUCTION

YET]]

I'm not the one packing said 'bunny rabbit' with a multitude of ways to maim and injure.

[[it seems like an hilarious idea though ngl]]

Pokemon are unnatural creatures with highly unnatural abilities. Why not use them in the way they were clearly intended to be used?

To do what? Maim and injure people for the hell of it? What the hell kind of rationale is that? That's like saying if you have a gun you might as well just go shoot somebody with it because if not, then what's the point.

Why own a gun if you have no intention of using it? It's highly wasteful.

[[starting to sense

that we may have differing worldviews here]]

You don't have to main and injure, but you could certainly do more than just letting the creature rot in a cage. My personal choice would be the former, but I'm aware that I'm rather unique in my visions.

[...what is the deal with these psychopaths calling him up for a chat, does he just have a sign taped to his back that says GREAT CONVERSATIONALIST FOR MURDERERS AND MADMEN or something.]

Your vision is to raise up an army of attack rabbits to maim and injure the populace just because a) they can, and b) you can't think of anything better to do with your time?

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